She’s Baaaacckk

Well like the scary girl in Poltergeist announced “shes back”.  Yes, I am back, after a long hiatus where along with the rest of humanity I was trying to hold it together as I watched us become a nation full of day-drinkers attempting to home school a generation of hypochondriacs. 

The days started out with an “all for one and one for all” mentality.  Generously peppered with the warm and fuzzy feeling that we were all out for a common goal.  To “stop the spread”, “bend the curve” while improving our skills at puzzle guessing on Wheel of Fortune and testing our IQ  with Jeopardy! 

We tried to cook, invented signature dishes – the “confinement casserole”  – and signature cocktails – the “Rona-Rita” and the “Nine-tini .”  We learned how to bake and returned to family meals around the table.  We looked at our children and thought – this is so nice to be able to spend time as a family.  That lasted about 2 ½ days.  Because after that the siren songs of “Im bored” kicked in – but unlike busier times – there was NOTHING to do! 

Primary school kids began to think that Tick-Tok was akin to Fox News when it came to capturing the news of the day.  Snapchat became the new telegraph where speaking emoji quickly resembled morse code.  Instagram became the community support group for the homebound and afraid. 

High School kids turned hiding in their rooms into an Olympic sport.  And the College kids, Oh those College Kids – those that had the sweet tequila of freedom turn to sour milk in their mouths – they were the real gift that kept on giving.  Weren’t they?  How quickly they morphed into the gargoyle in the basement that was poised to fly around the room pooping fireballs if you even tried to sympathize about their “lost college experience.”  Because as full grown adults we have never faced adversity and disappointment and couldn’t possibly understand.

The good news is that we made it.  WE MADE IT THROUGH!  Let’s celebrate the simple victory that we survived – and let us mourn those who did not by remembering the good times and living our lives in honor and memory of them.   Now is the time to burn your masks,  remember how to live, laugh, smile so people can see it, visit your neighbors, hug your grandparents, join weight watchers and your local AA.  Bill W could use a few new friends – and many of us could too. 

And when the sun goes down do not be afraid to dance in the street, sing at the top of your lungs – just run inside before the cops show up – if only because the pooping gargoyle is back at the frat house in a reality far, far away.